Welcome to Days Like This with Deborah Sloan

Read this first!

Hello! I’m Deborah, middle-aged, married, with four daughters, I live in Belfast in the North of Ireland and I left my career in 2022 and have been figuring out who I am ever since. Now, I spend a lot of my time writing about the world I am living in.

Here’s what I wrote about this week…

More about me…

Having worked in higher education for almost twenty years, in 2021, I was restless and stuck and I took a one-year career break. Nine months in, I made the gut-based decision to resign from my job. I didn’t know where I was going but I knew I didn’t want to go back to my old life and the identity I had there.

As a mum of four girls, juggling work, home, church, and other commitments for many years, I found my identity was mainly based on the roles I fulfilled for others. I struggled to get what I needed for myself on a daily basis never mind achieve my full potential (whatever that is!). I thought my career would provide fulfilment. I was reluctant to give it up and so I battled hard to hang on to it alongside the demands of motherhood. But I always felt resentful and that something was missing from my life. In many ways, I was probably missing from my own life. I didn’t really have my own story and my own fully formed identity. I was just a bit-part in everyone else’s story. 

How do I get your writing?

I tend to share writing once a week, usually mid to late afternoon on a Friday. Some people say when they see my writing appear, it feels like the start of the weekend! Occasionally I take a Friday off or a longer holiday but I’ll let you know if I plan to disappear for a bit. All you need to do to is click this button and subscribe…

But do read on, if you want to know more about what I write about…

What do you write about?

I write about leaving. When I reached that stage called midlife, I started asking questions about my relationship with various institutions such as motherhood, career, and the church. I left various things, not just places, but also beliefs I used to have. For most of my life, I did what I was told. I measured myself on being a good mother, a good employee, a good person. Now, I question the impact that years of conforming had on my life and the difference that leaving those various things has made to my life. I tend to talk about my faith regularly in my writing, but I do not write exclusively about it. It just informs a lot of who I am. I process my (internal and external) journey through my writing and write on a range of topics. I am also a fairly normal person! I like good books, good television, travel, food, fashion and nice things so you’ll find recommendations around these in my writing too. One thing I do not do is write self-help. You are unlikely to find any advice in my writing. The only way I help is by sharing my experiences.

I grew up and still live in Belfast, Northern Ireland. Home, my husband and my children are very important to me. They feature regularly in my writing!

I am also on Instagram, LinkedIn and X (formerly known as Twitter) if you want to find me on any of those places.

Why subscribe?

I am grateful to every single person that subscribes, who believes in what I write and I look forward to getting to know you. Thank you!

Here are some nice things that subscribers have said about my writing…

“I really love your writing, Deborah. You have a way of describing lots of feelings that I’ve had but haven’t been able to quite put them into words. It is wonderful”. 

“I felt drawn to write to you. It feels slightly odd to contact a complete stranger, but l’ve been reading your Substack recently, and wanted to say that your words have been meaningful for me. Thank you for sharing your writing”. 

“I can identify with what you’re saying, and I appreciate your honesty and transparency. There are many benefits to growing older, such as finally accepting yourself for who you are. Wonderful piece!”. 

Here are some recent posts that have resonated with people: